Parents Guide Archives - Friends of Karen http://www.friendsofkaren.org/category/resources/parents-guide/ Supporting critically-ill children and their families Fri, 14 Aug 2026 15:14:20 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.6.2 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/fok-balloons-150x150.png Parents Guide Archives - Friends of Karen http://www.friendsofkaren.org/category/resources/parents-guide/ 32 32 Friends of Karen Summer Tips https://www.friendsofkaren.org/friends-of-karen-summer-tips-2/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=friends-of-karen-summer-tips-2 Wed, 24 Jun 2026 15:35:20 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=15876 We’ve compiled camps designed specifically for children with cancer, and other illnesses, and for their SIBLINGS. These programs understand the medical and emotional needs of families facing illness. It also includes grief camps for siblings and families that run throughout the year.

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Summer is a season many families look forward to, but when you are caring for a child with a serious illness, the longer days and changing routines can bring unique challenges. Balancing medical appointments, treatments, and long hours at the clinic while trying to create joyful summer memories for all your children can feel overwhelming.

When school ends, parents may feel added pressure to maintain structure and find meaningful activities for siblings. At the same time, children with serious illnesses may feel disappointed or left out if they are unable to participate in certain summer traditions, camps, or gatherings because of health concerns or increased vulnerability to illness.

The good news is that there are plenty of ways to create a summer filled with fun, connection, and special moments for the whole family. Here are some ideas and resources to help seriously ill children and their siblings enjoy the season together safely.

Summer Camps

There are many summer camp programs designed specifically for children with serious illnesses and their siblings. These camps often provide medical support on-site and understand the flexibility families need when health circumstances can change unexpectedly.

Many camps offer opportunities for children to build friendships, gain confidence, and enjoy activities that are adapted to their individual needs.

Here’s a link to our recently posted resource about summer camps!

Community Resources

Your community may offer free or low-cost opportunities for families to enjoy together. These activities can provide fun, flexibility, and opportunities for siblings to connect.

Libraries

Local libraries often offer a variety of free summer programs, including story times, crafts, STEM activities, and special events for children of all ages. Many libraries also provide free museum passes that families can borrow to visit museums, aquariums, zoos, and other local attractions.

Be sure to check with your local library or bookstore for summer reading programs. Many offer incentives, prizes, and fun challenges that can keep children engaged throughout the season.

Libraries

Local parks, state parks, and recreation departments often provide family-friendly activities such as nature walks, wildlife programs, outdoor crafts, and guided hikes. Many programs can be adapted to different ability levels, making them accessible for a variety of needs and energy levels.

Urban Park Rangers and State Parks – provide recreational activities for families including hikes and wildlife management
 
https://www.nycgovparks.org/programs/rangers

Family Fun Nights

With the uncertainty that often accompanies a serious illness, creating opportunities to connect as a family can be especially meaningful. Here are a few simple ways to make lasting summer memories together.

A Good Old Fashioned Movie Night – Share a nostalgic classic from your childhood or even a movie marathon. Remember that show “Dinner and a movie?” Take some inspiration from the show and try out a theme.  Does your child love Disney princesses or superheroes? Star Wars, Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? Whip up a snack or meal to complement the film, dress up like the characters, duel with light sabers (or craft them) between movies,

Cooking Contest Night – Select three surprise ingredients and challenge each family member to incorporate them into a dish or snack. Taste-test together and award fun categories such as “Most Creative,” “Best Presentation,” or “Family Favorite”!

Get Creative – Sidewalk Chalk Painting: use old sidewalk chalk, crumble it up, place it in muffin tins, add water and you have sidewalk chalk paint! Paint on driveways and sidewalks! Make friendship bracelets, create family portraits together or come up with your own family crest or motto.

Camp Out at Home – Bring the adventure of camping to your backyard or living room. Set up a tent or build a blanket fort, read stories by flashlight, tell jokes, and enjoy favorite camping treats. The best part? Your own bed is only a few steps away.

Read Together – Snuggles and bedtime stories are some of the best moments of parenthood and childhood. Take it up a notch and form a family book club.

Family Photo Shoot – Gather old costumes, hats, and accessories and let everyone get creative. Have children style the adults and vice versa. Capture the fun with photos you’ll treasure for years to come.

Create a Summer Wish List – As a family, brainstorm activities and experiences everyone would enjoy. Some may be simple, like having a picnic in the backyard, watching a sunset, or making homemade popsicles. Creating a wish list together helps children focus on possibilities and gives everyone something to look forward to.

Energy-Friendly Activities for Children with Serious Illnesses

Summer fun doesn’t have to be high-energy to be meaningful. Many children living with serious illnesses experience fatigue, mobility challenges, treatment side effects, or restrictions that can make traditional summer activities difficult. The key is finding opportunities that allow children to participate at their own pace while still feeling included.


Here are a few low-energy, flexible activities that children and siblings can enjoy together:

  • Backyard Picnics: Spread out a blanket in the yard or even on the living room floor and enjoy lunch together in a new setting.
  • Water Play at Home: A small sprinkler, water table, bubbles, or even bowls of water and measuring cups can provide sensory fun without requiring a lot of energy.
  • Nature Scavenger Hunts: Create a simple list of things to spot from a porch, window, backyard, or short walk around the neighborhood.
  • Arts and Crafts: Painting, coloring, beading, scrapbooking, and other creative projects can be adapted to different ability levels and enjoyed from the comfort of home.
  • Virtual Adventures: Many museums, aquariums, zoos, and national parks offer virtual tours that allow children to explore the world from home.
  • Gardening Together: Plant flowers, herbs, or vegetables in containers or small garden beds. Watching something grow can be a rewarding summer project for the whole family.
  • Memory-Making Projects: Create a family scrapbook, summer journal, or photo album together. Invite siblings to contribute stories, drawings, and favorite memories.
  • Game Time: Board games, card games, puzzles, and family trivia nights offer opportunities for connection and laughter while accommodating a wide range of energy levels.


Remember that participation may look different from day to day. Some days a child may feel up to joining an activity for hours; other days, a few minutes may be enough. Following your child’s lead and focusing on connection rather than expectations can help create positive experiences for everyone involved.

A Few Final Reminders

Be mindful of the heat, stay hydrated, and remember that some children undergoing treatment may be more sensitive to sun exposure. Check with your child’s medical team about any precautions that may be needed, and don’t forget the sunscreen.

Most importantly, remember that meaningful summer memories don’t have to be elaborate. Sometimes the moments children remember most are the simple ones—laughing together, sharing a favorite treat, catching fireflies, roasting marshmallows, or spending time with the people they love.

We hope your summer is filled with connection, comfort, joy, and plenty of opportunities for your family to make special memories together.

The post Friends of Karen Summer Tips appeared first on Friends of Karen.

]]> Back To School Reentry Tips & Tricks https://www.friendsofkaren.org/back-to-school-2026/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=back-to-school-2026 Fri, 14 Aug 2026 14:51:49 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=16206 We’ve compiled camps designed specifically for children with cancer, and other illnesses, and for their SIBLINGS. These programs understand the medical and emotional needs of families facing illness. It also includes grief camps for siblings and families that run throughout the year.

The post Back To School Reentry Tips & Tricks appeared first on Friends of Karen.

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Back to school season has long been a busy time at Friends of Karen. For weeks employees and volunteers have been tirelessly working to fulfill school supply lists for our Friends of Karen children and their siblings. It is all well worth it when we receive photos of the adorable children smiling ear to ear with the wonderful backpacks of freshly packaged school supplies that have arrived at their doors. The goals behind the gift program are multilayered: to provide joy, normalcy and help alleviate parental stress by taking something off their plates. Our mission is always to provide support in any way we can.


Though the end of summer can be a bittersweet time for any child, children reentering school after being sidelined by a serious illness may have many mixed emotions that are more than just the typical butterflies. Going back to school can mark a return to normalcy – after an experience with cancer (or other serious illness) that felt anything but. While at first it may have been a little fun that “school” was a tutor coming to your house while you studied in your pajamas , that gets old quickly and children are often eager to return to their friends and welcome the opportunity to socialize. Just as it is normal to feel excited, feeling worried about anything from being teased to not being able to keep up physically and academically is also very typical, especially when “normal” has most certainly changed and shifted to a “new normal”.

Friends of Karen children share some worries they experienced when they returned to school after treatment :

  • Just going back to school in general
  • My friends not recognizing me
  • Students making fun of me for being bald
  • Looking different because my face is puffy from medications
  • Being sick and having to go home early
  • Not being able to make it to class on time
  • Missing school because of doctors appointments
  • Not being able to concentrate- “chemo brain”
  • Someone pulling my hat/wig off and everyone seeing my bald head
  • Not being able to participate in gym or recess

Friends of Karen Sibling Support Specialists have turned to the experts- veteran FOK children to share some advice for heading back to school. (We’ve added our own tips as well.)

Here’s what might help…

Have A Meeting Before You Return

Parents and children should meet with teachers, counselors, the school nurse or anyone else who the child will work closely with and help the transition go smoothly. Develop a plan to address any concerns or meet any physical, emotional and/or academic needs/accommodations.

Allow space to talk it out

While it may feel like pulling teeth at times to get your child to communicate, opening up space for them to talk about their feelings with loved ones is so important. Depending on the age of the child, you might use a book to spark discussion or ask prompting questions like “ I wonder how you are feeling about school starting…” Adding your own experiences can normalize challenging feelings: “I remember the first day of school being a little tricky for me some years. How are you feeling about it this year?” Remember to validate any feelings (i.e. Yeah, I can totally understand how you might be feeling nervous about school. I’m here for you. How can I help?”

Educate

There are ways big and small to bring illness education into the schools to ensure teachers/classmates/coaches/administration etc. understand what the child is going through physically, socially and emotionally. Maybe you are more private and would prefer a select few knowing your health status/treatment or perhaps your view is the more knowledge others have the more understanding and compassionate they will be. Whatever you decide, it is your choice.

Give permission for your Sibling Support Specialist or treatment team member such as a hospital Psychologist, Social Worker or Child Life Specialist to connect with the school. Julia, 16, says she would have liked for her teachers to have understood that while she was post treatment, she was still experiencing side effects and complications.

You may even consider sending a hospital care team member or a Friends of Karen, Sibling Support Specialist to the classroom to provide illness education and answer any questions your classmates might have. Friends of Karen Sibling Support Specialists have facilitated special activities and discussions on topics from anti bullying/kindness to practical knowledge of medical devices.

Reading a book to her class helped Sophia (then 8) feel better able to talk about her illness. Here are some of our favorites about cancer in general and school reentry(there are also great resources on specific cancers):

  • Taking Cancer to School
  • A kids book about cancer
  • Pierre the Penguin

Communicate How You Want Others To Treat You

Maybe you want your classmates to act like nothing has happened, or maybe you welcome talking about what you’ve been through. As long as you are safe and comfortable, it’s your choice. Often people don’t know how to act- having a teacher or other adult communicate your wishes can help put everyone at ease.

Find Your Go-To People For Support

Having a tutoring teacher from the same school helped Sophia because she was able to ask her questions and talk to her not only about academic things. Make a list of the adults you can go to for support. When you can identify your go-to supporters/mentors it can help you feel more confident and less alone.

Don’t forget your friends! Shania, 14, recommends seeking out your past friends and also making new ones.

Find Your Go-To People For Support

Depending on your child’s needs, they may qualify for:

  • A 504 Plan, which provides accommodations to help them access learning.
  • An Individualized Education Program (IEP) if cancer treatment has significantly affected learning and specialized educational services are needed.

Manage Fatigue

  • Expect that energy levels may vary from day to day.
  • Consider a shortened school day or gradual return if needed.
  • Schedule rest breaks and avoid overloading extracurricular activities at first.

Reduce Infection Risk

  • Remind your child to wash their hands often.
  • Ask the school to notify you if there are outbreaks of illnesses like flu or chickenpox.
  • Follow your oncology team’s guidance about when it’s safe to attend school, especially if blood counts are low.

Support Learning

  • Treatment can temporarily affect attention, memory, or processing speed.
  • Ask about classroom accommodations if needed, such as:
    • Extra time for assignments or tests
    • Reduced homework during treatment
    • Copies of class notes
    • Flexible attendance
    • Access to tutoring or homebound instruction if necessary

Don't Forget About The Siblings!

Whether they verbalize it or not, often siblings of ill children feel less important, overlooked or even invisible. They may feel protective and concerned about their sibling but also think “What about me?” As parents/guardians it is important to remember that the start of the school year is a milestone for all children – filled with excitement, worries and butterflies . Check in with all your children and let them know that you are here for them whatever they are feeling.

Chances Are People Will Be Happy To See You

Camila, age 6, tells us that the love and the support that her friends and her teachers gave her when they saw her again helped. The day she came back to school everybody was so happy. Shania urges us not to be afraid. Everyone will accept you for who you are and what happened.

Listen To Your Brave Side And Remember To Have Hope

Our Friends of Karen veterans tell us to “try new things. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Don’t get caught on your past and try to focus on the future.” Beginnings and new starts are usually a little bit scary- with time and support from others, you will thrive.

We hope that your school year is filled with special memories and the magic of childhood. Remember to work hard, be gentle with yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Everyone at Friends of Karen wishes you a very happy Back to School!

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]]> Summer Camps and Grief Camps https://www.friendsofkaren.org/summer-camps-and-grief-camps/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=summer-camps-and-grief-camps Wed, 27 May 2026 00:46:54 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=15816 We’ve compiled camps designed specifically for children with cancer, and other illnesses, and for their SIBLINGS. These programs understand the medical and emotional needs of families facing illness. It also includes grief camps for siblings and families that run throughout the year.

The post Summer Camps and Grief Camps appeared first on Friends of Karen.

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We’ve compiled camps designed specifically for children with cancer, and other illnesses, and for their SIBLINGS. These programs understand the medical and emotional needs of families facing illness. It also includes grief camps for siblings and families that run throughout the year.

Day Camps

Sunrise Day Camp
Wheatly Heights
Services Long Island and Queens
https://www.sunrisedaycamp-longisland.org/

Statan Island
Services Brooklyn, Manhattan and Statan Island
https://sunrisedaycamp-statenisland.org/what-we-do/

Pearl River
Services Westchester, Rockland, Burgon, Bronx
https://www.sunrisedaycamp-pearlriver.org/sunrise-day-camp/

For Siblings and Ill children with current diagnosis or are in remission of cancer Ages 3 ½ to 16 years

June 30- August 13
**Transportation is provided daily **
You can sign up for the entire summer and attend a couple days or every day of summer, they are flexible and know the inconsistencies of treatment.

Sleep Away Camps

Camp Rising Sun, Colbrook, CT
 https://www.camprisingsun.com/

For Siblings and Ill children with current diagnosis or are in remission of cancer Ages 5 to 17 years

August 22- 27

Hole in the Wall Gang, Ashford, CT
 https://www.holeinthewallgang.org/programs/summer-camp/

For Siblings and Ill children with current diagnosis or are in remission of cancer Ages 7 to 15 years and Counselor in Training opportunities for ages 16-18 years.

Weekly camps between June 19 and August 21

Weeks are categorized by diagnosis and include cancer, sickle cell, blood disorders, Immunologic Disorders, Metabolic/Mitochondrial Disorders, Neurofibromatosis, Solid Organ & Multivisceral Transplant: Campers must be at least 1-year post-transplant

**May help with transportation
** Also offers family camps during the weekends of Spring and Fall

Happiness is Camping, Hardwick, NJ
 https://www.happinessiscamping.org/

For siblings and ill children with a diagnosis or in remission of cancer or sickle cell Ages 5 -17 years

Week long camps between July 5- July 31
May attend one week or all weeks

**Offers weekend family camps in spring and summer

 

Camp Simcha, Glen Spey, NY
https://www.campsimcha.org/

For children with a diagnosis or in remission of cancer or a blood disorder

Week longs camps between June 30 to August 24 based on gender

*Jewish Faith camp

 

Camp Happy Times, Wayne County, PA
https://thevaleriefund.org/what-we-do/camp-happy-times/

For siblings and ill children with a diagnosis or in remission of cancer Ages 5 to 21

August 14-20

** Transportation Provided

Bereavement Camps

Camp Compassion
Hosted by The Cove
At Club Getaway in Kent,CT
https://www.covect.org/campcompassion

May 15-17
Ages 6-17


Camp Cope
Hosted by Cope
At Camp Wayne for Girls in Preston Park, PA
https://copefoundation.org/camp-cope/

August 21-23
Ages 7-17
*Concurrent With Parent Retreat


Hole in the Wall Gang
Family Program
Ashford, CT
https://www.holeinthewallgang.org/programs/connecticut-location/bereavement-program

Meet 3 weekends in a year. New session starts this fall.

All Ages and for parents who only have one child
*Specifically for families whose child died from an illness
*Provides transportation


Camp Good Grief
Hosted by East End Hospice
At Camp Pa-qua-tuck Center Moriches, New York
https://www.eehcampgoodgrief.org/

July 20-23
Ages 4- 17 years

Comfort Zone Camp
 Nationwide – Camps in various locations
https://comfortzonecamp.org/

New Jersey Camp Mason in Hardwick Township, NJ April 10 – April 12
New York Camp DeWolfe Wading River, NY July 31- August 2

Ages 7-17 and young adult sessions
Some include concurrent Parent Camp
*Has online support group sessions meets weekly for a month

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]]> How to Talk With Kids About Tragedies & Other Traumatic News Events https://www.friendsofkaren.org/how-to-talk-with-kids-about-tragedies-other-traumatic-news-events/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-to-talk-with-kids-about-tragedies-other-traumatic-news-events Wed, 01 Nov 2023 20:50:00 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=6459 Television and newspapers today are filled with headlines about the tragic conflict with Israel and Palestine, and the brutal war between Ukraine and Russia.  In this very difficult time, children want to know what’s going on in the world and may be asking you questions about what they have heard discussed or seen in the media.  The American Academy of...

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Television and newspapers today are filled with headlines about the tragic conflict with Israel and Palestine, and the brutal war between Ukraine and Russia.  In this very difficult time, children want to know what’s going on in the world and may be asking you questions about what they have heard discussed or seen in the media. 

The American Academy of Pediatrics offers guidance on “How to Talk with Kids About Tragedies and Other Traumatic News Events.”  Click here to read this excellent article by David Schonfeld, MD, FAAP, to help you navigate these challenging conversations.  

The post How to Talk With Kids About Tragedies & Other Traumatic News Events appeared first on Friends of Karen.

]]> Helping Children Understand Leukemia https://www.friendsofkaren.org/helping-children-understand-leukemia/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=helping-children-understand-leukemia Fri, 01 Sep 2023 12:18:00 +0000 http://www.friendsofkaren.org/fokdev2022/?p=6182 Our Sibling Support Program team of four child life specialists and creative arts therapists knows that learning about an illness is different than understanding it. Often when illnesses are not explained to children in an age-appropriate manner they may fill in the gaps with their imaginations, creating stories that may be even scarier than the reality. To help ill children,...

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Our Sibling Support Program team of four child life specialists and creative arts therapists knows that learning about an illness is different than understanding it.

Often when illnesses are not explained to children in an age-appropriate manner they may fill in the gaps with their imaginations, creating stories that may be even scarier than the reality. To help ill children, siblings and their parents understand how Leukemia affects a child’s body, our Sibling Support Specialists provide an interactive illness education session.

The Sibling Support Specialist begins by explaining that Leukemia is cancer of the blood, and guides in exploring the parts of the blood (red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets inside plasma) using a worksheet Friends of Karen staff created.

After learning how each of these parts function, the child writes about or draws pictures of the cells in action. The Sibling Support Specialists will often use the book Chemo to the Rescue: A Children’s Book about Leukemia by Mary Brent and Caitlin Knutsson, in tandem with the session.

The next step is to create some “healthy blood.” In a small container we use water to represent plasma, the liquid portion of our blood. Then, we add two different colored beads; red (red blood cells that transport oxygen) and white (white blood cells that fight off germs), and a jeweled sticker to hold things together like platelets that help our blood clot.

Then we make a sample of “unhealthy blood” that is the same as the healthy blood but has one major difference – there are Leukemia cells represented with small balls of tissues. Once the tissue balls are in the water they enlarge and take up space.

This represents how Leukemia cells multiply rapidly and minimize the space for the other healthy blood cells to do their job, resulting in side effects like, being tired, bruising easily, and getting sick more often. Friends of Karen Sibling Support Specialists complete the session by explaining how chemotherapy and radiation can help get rid of the Leukemia cells. We will often give children the opportunity to “act like chemo” by removing the tissues/Leukemia from the blood.

The post Helping Children Understand Leukemia appeared first on Friends of Karen.

]]> Back to School Jitters, Tips and Tricks https://www.friendsofkaren.org/back-to-school-jitters-tips-and-tricks/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=back-to-school-jitters-tips-and-tricks Fri, 18 Aug 2023 14:16:25 +0000 http://www.friendsofkaren.org/fokdev2022/?p=5995 Back to school season has long been a busy time at Friends of Karen. For weeks employees and volunteers have been tirelessly working to fulfill school supply lists for our Friends of Karen children and their siblings. It is all well worth it when we receive photos of the adorable children smiling ear to ear with the wonderful backpacks

The post Back to School Jitters, Tips and Tricks appeared first on Friends of Karen.

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Back to school season has long been a busy time at Friends of Karen. For weeks employees and volunteers have been tirelessly working to fulfill school supply lists for our Friends of Karen children and their siblings.  It is all well worth it when we receive photos of the adorable children smiling ear to ear with the wonderful backpacks of freshly packaged school supplies that have arrived at their doors. The goals behind the gift program are multilayered: to provide joy and help alleviate parental stress by taking something off their plates. Our mission is always to provide support in any way we can.

Though the end of summer can be a bittersweet time for any child, children reentering school after being sidelined by a serious illness may have many mixed emotions that are more than just the typical butterflies. Going back to school can mark a return to normalcy – after an experience with cancer (or other serious illness) that felt anything but. While at first it may have been a little fun that “school” was a tutor coming to your house while you studied in your pajamas, that gets old quickly and children are often eager to return to their friends and welcome the opportunity to socialize. Just as it is normal to feel excited, feeling worried about anything from being teased to not being able to keep up physically and academically is also very typical, especially when “normal” has most certainly changed and shifted to a “new normal.”

Friends of Karen children share some worries they experienced when they returned to school after treatment:

  • Just going back to school in general.
  • My friends not recognizing me.
  • Students making fun of me for being bald.
  • Looking different because my face is puffy from medications.
  • Being sick and having to go home early.
  • Not being able to make it to class on time.
  • Missing school because of doctor appointments.
  • Not being able to concentrate- “chemo brain.”
  • Someone pulling my hat/wig off and everyone seeing my bald head.
  • Not being able to participate in gym or recess.

Friends of Karen Sibling Support Specialists have turned to the experts- veteran FOK children to share some advice for heading back to school. (We’ve added our own tips as well.)

HERE’S WHAT MIGHT HELP…

Have a meeting before you return
Parents and children should meet with teachers, counselors, the school nurse, or anyone else who the child will work closely with and help the transition go smoothly. Develop a plan to address any concerns or meet any physical, emotional and/or academic needs/accommodations.

Allow space to talk it out
While it may feel like pulling teeth at times to get your child to communicate, opening space for them to talk about their feelings with loved ones is so important. Depending on the age of the child, you might use a book to spark discussion or ask prompting questions like “I wonder how you are feeling about school starting…” Adding your own experiences can normalize challenging feelings: “I remember the first day of school being a little tricky for me some years. How are you feeling about it this year?” Remember to validate any feelings (i.e., Yeah, I can totally understand how you might be feeling nervous about school. I’m here for you. How can I help?”

Educate
There are ways big and small to bring illness education into the schools to ensure teachers/classmates/coaches/administration etc. understand what the child is going through physically, socially, and emotionally.  Maybe you are more private and would prefer a select few knowing your health status/treatment or perhaps your view is the more knowledge others have the more understanding and compassionate they will be.  Whatever you decide, it is your choice.

Give permission for your Sibling Support Specialist or treatment team member such as a hospital Psychologist, Social Worker, or Child Life Specialist to connect with the school. Julia, age 16, says she would have liked her teachers to have understood that while she was post-treatment, she was still experiencing side effects and complications.

You may even consider sending a hospital care team member or a Friends of Karen, Sibling Support Specialist to the classroom to provide illness education and answer any questions your classmates might have.

Reading a book to her class helped Sophia (then 8) feel better able to talk about her illness. Here are some of our favorites about cancer in general and school reentry (there are also great resources on specific cancers):

Communicate how you want others to treat you.
Maybe you want your classmates to act like nothing has happened, or maybe you welcome talking about what you’ve been through. As long as you are safe and comfortable, it’s your choice. Often people don’t know how to act- having a teacher or other adult communicate your wishes can help put everyone at ease.

Find your go-to people for support.
Having a tutoring teacher from the same school helped Sophia because she was able to ask her questions and talk to her not only about academic things. Make a list of the adults you can go to for support. When you can identify your go-to supporters/mentors it can help you feel more confident and less alone.

Don’t forget your friends! Shania, 14, recommends seeking out your past friends and also making new ones.

Don’t forget about the siblings!
Whether they verbalize it or not, often siblings of ill children feel less important, overlooked or even invisible. They may feel protective and concerned about their sibling but also think “What about me?” As parents/guardians it is important to remember that the start of the school year is a milestone for all children – filled with excitement, worries and butterflies. Check in with all your children and let them know that you are here for them whatever they are feeling.

Chances are people will be so happy to see you.
Camila, age 6, tells us that the love and the support that her friends and her teachers gave her when they saw her again helped.  The day she came back to school everybody was so happy. Shania urges us not to be afraid. Everyone will accept you for who you are and what happened.

Listen to your  brave side and remember to have hope.
Our Friends of Karen veterans tell us to “try new things. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Don’t get caught on your past and try to focus on the future.” Beginnings and new starts are usually a little bit scary- with time and support from others, you will thrive.

We hope that your school year is filled with special memories and the magic of childhood. Remember to work hard, be gentle with yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Everyone at Friends of Karen wishes you a very happy Back to School!

The post Back to School Jitters, Tips and Tricks appeared first on Friends of Karen.

]]> Tips for Parents on how to talk to your children about COVID-19 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/tips-for-parents-on-how-to-talk-to-your-children-about-covid-19/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=tips-for-parents-on-how-to-talk-to-your-children-about-covid-19 Mon, 01 Jun 2020 19:49:00 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=6474 We understand this is a stressful time, and as a parent, you may not know what to say to your children about this health crisis. Check out these helpful tips from Friends of Karen sibling support specialist Siobhan.

The post Tips for Parents on how to talk to your children about COVID-19 appeared first on Friends of Karen.

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We understand this is a stressful time, and as a parent, you may not know what to say to your children about this health crisis. Check out these helpful tips from Friends of Karen sibling support specialist Siobhan.

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]]> Summer Fun – Tips for Parents 2024 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/summer-fun-tips-for-parents-2024/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=summer-fun-tips-for-parents-2024 Tue, 04 Jun 2024 19:11:53 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=9962 When the school year ends, a large portion of our day that had been structured activity is now open. Siblings of ill children are kept engaged at school so they typically do not have to go to doctor appointments or stay long hours at the clinic with their ill brother or sister. But when school ends, parents may feel more...

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When the school year ends, a large portion of our day that had been structured activity is now open. Siblings of ill children are kept engaged at school so they typically do not have to go to doctor appointments or stay long hours at the clinic with their ill brother or sister. But when school ends, parents may feel more pressure to maintain some structure and provide activities to engage siblings. At the same time, ill children may feel more left out if they can’t enjoy BBQs or camp programs because they are more susceptible to becoming sick. Therefore, we need activities that provide structure and allow ill children and siblings to enjoy them together.

Summer Camps

There are a variety of summer camps for children that are ill and their siblings. They provide medical staff and are flexible with enrollment, knowing things can change daily with someone that is ill. Some are day camps and provide daily transportation. Some are week-long overnight camps, for children and parents. Camps are a great form of structure and connect kids that are in a similar situation. All are free. Check out their websites.

Camp Sunrise – Day Camp June 27 to August 15
Ages 3 ½ to 16
Pearl River NY, Long Island NY, Staten Island NY
https://www.sunriseassociation.org 

The Hole in the Wall Gang – Day Camp, Sleep Away and Retreats
All ages and families
Ashford ,CT
https://www.holeinthewallgang.org

Camp Adventure – Sleepaway August 19 to 25
Ages 6-18
Shelter Island, NY
https://kidsneedmore.org/how-we-help/camp-adventure/

Camp Rising Sun- Week long sleep away camp August 19 to 23
Ages 5-15
Colebrook, CT
http://www.camprisingsun.com/

Community Resources

Your town has resources that are made for you to enjoy. These are great opportunities for siblings to have fun together or in small groups.

Libraries- have a variety or free programs and also have Free Museum Passes for the entire family to visit aquariums, museums and national landmarks.

Urban Park Rangers and State Parks – provide recreational activities for families including hikes and wildlife management.
https://www.nycgovparks.org/programs/rangers

Family Fun Nights

Keeping social distance and staying off the tablets. Find ways for the entire family to enjoy each other’s company with these suggested at-home activities.

Cooking Contest Night – Choose 3 random ingredients and each family member must include each in their dish. Rate each dish and choose an ultimate chef.

Sidewalk Chalk Painting – Use old sidewalk chalk, crumble it up, place it in muffin tins, add water and you have sidewalk chalk paint. Paint on driveways and sidewalks.

Camp Out at Home – Take a tent or pitch some sheets up in the backyard or in the living room.  Break out the flashlights and a book with silly scary stories to share.  Don’t forget the snacks!

Photo Shoot – Be a little silly and play dress up. Hair, makeup, old Halloween costumes…  Have kids dress adults and adults dress the kids. Be sure to take photos!

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]]> Preparing for Back to School; Joy, Butterflies and all the feelings in between https://www.friendsofkaren.org/preparing-for-back-to-school-joy-butterflies-and-all-the-feelings-in-between/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=preparing-for-back-to-school-joy-butterflies-and-all-the-feelings-in-between Mon, 19 Aug 2024 18:52:08 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=11259 Back to school season has long been a busy time at Friends of Karen. For weeks employees and volunteers have been tirelessly working to fulfill school supply lists for our Friends of Karen children and their siblings.  It is all well worth it when we receive photos of the adorable children smiling ear to ear with the wonderful backpacks of...

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Back to school season has long been a busy time at Friends of Karen. For weeks employees and volunteers have been tirelessly working to fulfill school supply lists for our Friends of Karen children and their siblings.  It is all well worth it when we receive photos of the adorable children smiling ear to ear with the wonderful backpacks of freshly packaged school supplies that have arrived at their doors. The goals behind the gift program are multilayered: to provide joy, help alleviate parental stress by taking something off FoK parents’ plates and to facilitate a typical childhood ritual. Our mission is always to provide support in any way we can.

As parents we want new beginnings and transitions to be as easy and painless for our children as possible. We arrange transportation and pack snacks and bookbags and braid hair and brush teeth and a million other little things to prepare for the school year. Yet we also want to ensure that we are prepared to support our children socially and emotionally.

HERE’S WHAT THEY MIGHT BE FEELING…

Though the end of summer can be a bittersweet time for any child, children reentering school after being sidelined by a serious illness may have many mixed emotions that are more than just the typical butterflies. Whether they are returning to high school or beginning kindergarten, the days ahead are sure to be exciting (and maybe a little bit scary).  Back to school can mark a new beginning and/or return to normalcy – after an experience with cancer (or other serious illness) that felt anything but. While at first it may have been a little fun that “school” was a tutor coming to your house while you studied in your pajamas, that gets old quickly and children are often eager to return to their friends and welcome the opportunity to socialize. Just as it is normal to feel excited, feeling worried about anything from being teased to not being able to keep up physically and academically is also very typical, especially when “normal” has most certainly changed and shifted to a “new normal.”

Friends of Karen children share some worries they experienced when they returned to school after treatment:

  • Just going back to school in general.
  • My friends not recognizing me.
  • Students making fun of me for being bald.
  • Looking different because my face is puffy from medications.
  • Being sick and having to go home early.
  • Not being able to make it to class on time.
  • Missing school because of doctor appointments.
  • Not being able to concentrate- “chemo brain.”
  • Someone pulling my hat/wig off and everyone seeing my bald head.
  • Not being able to participate in gym or recess.

Friends of Karen Sibling Support Specialists have teamed up with the experts- veteran FoK children to collaborate and share some advice for heading back to school.

HERE’S WHAT MIGHT HELP…

Parents and children should meet with teachers, counselors, the school nurse, or anyone else who the child will work closely with and help the transition go smoothly. Develop a plan to address any concerns or meet any physical, emotional and/or academic needs/accommodations.

While it may feel like pulling teeth at times to get your child to communicate, opening space for them to talk about their feelings with loved ones is so important. Depending on the age of the child, you might use a book to spark discussion or ask prompting questions like “I wonder how you are feeling about school starting…” Adding your own experiences can normalize challenging feelings: “I remember the first day of school being a little tricky for me some years. How are you feeling about it this year?” Remember to validate any feelings (i.e., Yeah, I can totally understand how you might be feeling nervous about school. I’m here for you. How can I help?”

There are ways big and small to bring illness education into the schools to ensure teachers/classmates/coaches/administration etc. understand what the child is going through physically, socially, and emotionally.  Maybe you are more private and would prefer a select few knowing your health status/treatment or perhaps your view is the more knowledge others have the more understanding and compassionate they will be.  Whatever you decide, it is your choice.

Give permission for your Sibling Support Specialist or treatment team member such as a hospital Psychologist, Social Worker, or Child Life Specialist to connect with the school. Julia, age 16, says she would have liked her teachers to have understood that while she was post-treatment, she was still experiencing side effects and complications. You may even consider sending a hospital care team member or a Friends of Karen, Sibling Support Specialist to the classroom to provide illness education and answer any questions your classmates might have. Reading a book to her class helped Sophia (then 8) feel better able to talk about her illness. Parents can also read books to prepare for the anticipated separation that comes with school reentry. Here are some of our favorites about cancer in general, school reentry and help with separation anxiety (there are also great resources on specific cancers):

Maybe you want your classmates to act like nothing has happened, or maybe you welcome talking about what you’ve been through. As long as you are safe and comfortable, it’s your choice. Often people don’t know how to act- having a teacher or other adult communicate your wishes can help put everyone at ease.

Having a tutoring teacher from the same school helped Sophia because she was able to ask her questions and talk to her not only about academic things. Make a list of the adults you can go to for support. When you can identify your go-to supporters/mentors it can help you feel more confident and less alone. School Psychologists, Social Workers, favorite teachers and/or coaches are some ideas.

Don’t forget your friends! Shania, 14, recommends seeking out your past friends and also making new ones. For older kids who feel comfortable- reach out to a friend or two before school starts. Meeting up or even Facetime or texting before school starts can provide connection and ease some common social anxieties like “Will anyone I know be in my classes?”, “Who will I sit with at lunch?” etc. For younger children- parents may consider setting up playdates, joining playground meetups and joining local groups/PTA.

Whether they verbalize it or not, often siblings of ill children feel less important, overlooked or even invisible. They may feel protective and concerned about their sibling but also think “What about me?” As parents/guardians it is important to remember that the start of the school year is a milestone for all children – filled with excitement, worries and butterflies. Check in with all your children and let them know that you are here for them whatever they are feeling.

Camila, age 6, tells us that the love and the support that her friends and her teachers gave her when they saw her again helped.  The day she came back to school everybody was so happy. Shania urges us not to be afraid. Everyone will accept you for who you are and what happened.

Our Friends of Karen veterans tell us to “try new things. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Don’t get caught on your past and try to focus on the future.” Beginnings and new starts are usually a little bit scary- with time and support from others, you will thrive.

We hope that your school year is filled with special memories and the magic of childhood. Remember to work hard, be gentle with yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Everyone at Friends of Karen wishes you a very happy Back to School!

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]]> How To Help Your Kids Express The Hard Stuff https://www.friendsofkaren.org/how-to-help-your-kids-express-the-hard-stuff/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-to-help-your-kids-express-the-hard-stuff Tue, 04 Feb 2025 14:54:58 +0000 https://www.friendsofkaren.org/?p=13048 Friends of Karen is sharing its deep expertise in providing emotional support to children and families through a series of posts on the Forbes EQ (Equity Quotient) BrandVoice website. We kicked off the three-month series with advice for parents on how to have difficult conversations with their children. You can view the article through this link. Please share your feedback...

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A Friends of Karen child creates art with Siobhan Casey, a board-certified and licensed Creative Arts Therapist at Friends of Karen. The organization provides vital financial, advocacy, and emotional support to families navigating the challenges of having a critically ill child in the metro tri-state area. 

Friends of Karen is sharing its deep expertise in providing emotional support to children and families through a series of posts on the Forbes EQ (Equity Quotient) BrandVoice website. We kicked off the three-month series with advice for parents on how to have difficult conversations with their children. You can view the article through this link. Please share your feedback and any other topics you would find helpful for our experts to address.

Click here to read the full article on Forbes.com
How To Help Your Kids Express The Hard Stuff

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